Posted by Samuel on Mon 26th Jan, 2026 - tori.ng
Growing up in a monogamous household, she never expected her marriage to become polygamous, as the idea was not discussed before her wedding.
Hadiza Isma El-Rufai, the first wife of former Kaduna governor Nasir El-Rufai, has disclosed that joining a polygamous marriage was never part of her original plan.
Growing up in a monogamous household, she never expected her marriage to become polygamous, as the idea was not discussed before her wedding.
She shared that she gradually came to accept her situation.
The former First Lady of Kaduna spoke on social media during a discussion sparked by a lawyer announcing he was taking a second wife.
Mrs. El-Rufai explained that her husband was raised in a polygamous family, while she came from a monogamous background.
She entered marriage hoping for a monogamous life, but the marriage later became polygamous by her husband’s decision.
She said her choice was to stay in the marriage once it transformed.
She also noted that under Islamic law, a woman can leave a marriage without giving a reason, provided she returns the dowry.
She joked that by the time her marriage changed, she had already spent the dowry.
The former First Lady spoke about the benefits she has found as the first wife in a polygamous marriage.
She said it allows more time for personal interests, career, and her children.
She added that sharing responsibilities with co-wives reduces family pressure and in-law issues.
However, she said she could not see advantages for the man in a polygamous setup and encouraged people to make choices that suit them.
Nasir El-Rufai has three wives in total: Hadiza Isma El-Rufai, Asia Ahmad El-Rufai, and Aisha Ummi Garba El-Rufai.