Are you looking for a way to step up your bedroom game, here are what you need to do and try out.
*Photo used for illustrative purpose*
Here are
Dear Deidre's ideas for the faithful to give a loving, lasting relationship sexual staying power too as published by The Sun UK.
1. Give your love life priority: Making love should be one of the most important parts of a relationship, yet many of us devote just 20 minutes at the end of the occasional day.
Adults have many demands on their time and energy, but take your role as your partner’s lover as seriously as you take your roles as worker, parent, friend, etc. Set aside time to make love properly.
2. Revive the dating game: Remember when you would meet up for dates, go out somewhere pleasant, talk together and look forward to getting up close and personal?
Agree with your partner that you will devote every Wednesday night or whenever to talking, sharing a drink and a DVD, relaxing together. Sex must not be compulsory – but there’s a good chance you will both fancy it.
3. Make the most of the unexpected: If you suddenly realise you can both be home from work early one day, don’t mow the lawn or clean the cupboards. Use that precious gift of unexpected time together to add the freshness of variety to your loving.
4. Vary your setting: If you always make love in your good old double bed, look for chances to vary WHERE you make love as well as when.
5. Learn massage: To be touched caringly is one of our most basic human needs – as crucial as food and drink – but all too often touching gets cut down to a minimum, even by couples having sex.
Sharing skilled, all-over body massage brings great physical pleasure and relaxation to both the giver and receiver.
6. Separate sex from the rest: No relationship is perfect. Do be careful not to let petty irritations get in the way of making love.
7. Take a trip: Don’t let cheats have all the fun. At least once a year, get away with your legitimate partner to spend as long as possible alone together in a pleasant setting.
8. Share a bath or a shower: Not just sex in the shower. The bathroom has an atmosphere of relaxed intimacy. Make it a habit that one of you sits and chats while the other baths or showers.
9. Sort out the turn-offs: Sometimes husbands and wives develop habits or traits that put off their partner sexually. Talk honestly about what the problem is.
10. Change positions: Often you tend to settle for one or two which work. The trouble is this can lead to a growing sense of monotony. Promise yourselves that at least once a month you will try a different position.
11. Relax together: You generally need at least an hour together before sex to tune in to each other, relax, forget the other pressures of the day and to start to think about the pleasures you could share.
12. If you argue over how often you make love, negotiate a compromise: One of the most common sexual conflicts is how often couples are going to have sex.
It can lead to a tremendous easing of tension all round to bring the issue out into the open and work out a compromise. Agree which nights you will have sex and stick to it.
13. Remember there’s more to sex than intercourse: Don’t feel that sex always has to end with intercourse. It helps tremendously to break that deadening feeling of routine if at least sometimes you give each other satisfaction in other ways.
14. Don’t rush: To discover the more intense pleasure and passionate intimacy which in a good, lasting relationship, will more than replace the thrill of the new, you have to take your time.
Try slowing sex down and savouring each moment and each touch.
15. Dress up – or down: It helps to re-stimulate sexual triggers if our partner can’t always be sure what we will look and feel like when we make love. If you usually go to bed in nightclothes, for example, surprise them by appearing stark naked.
16. Take up a new interest together: Don’t lose sight of one another as people.
Find a spare-time activity you can regularly share – going for a swim, bowling, badminton, a film club or drama society.
17. Take turns making love: At least once a month take it in turns to caress one another while the other is free simply to enjoy.
18. Make love over the phone: It doesn’t have to be heavy, but an occasional hot text or sexy voicemail brightens the day.
19. If you’re depressed, DO something about it: Even quite mild depression leads to less interest in sex – as can the medication to treat it. If you haven’t felt like making love for some time and there’s no other obvious reason, talk through your life with your partner and work out what might be getting you down and why. Don’t just let some unhappy situation drag on.
20. Ring the changes: At least once a week try to think of some little extra to add a touch of glamour to your love life – a bottle of sparkling wine, scented oil, a flower.