Help! Just Thinking About Him and What He Will Do to Me Makes Me H*rny - Girl Narrates

 

I really am my own worst enemy – I can’t stand nice guys and always go for rats. My last three boyfriends were absolute horrors. All three let me down, broke my heart and took my money. Now I’ve spotted another bad lad and I’m excited, even though a perfectly lovely colleague has said he would marry me in a heartbeat.

 

My colleague has got money, manners and place of his own, but he just doesn’t turn me on. What is my problem? Have I got a death wish or something? The freak I do like goes to my gym. On the face of it, he’s bad news. He’s self-obsessed, moody and vain.

 

He doesn’t have a good reputation and I think he may have been in trouble a few times. My friends think he’s scary and deliberately go out of their way to avoid him, but he thrills me. I see in him a challenge and a fight. I imagine that if we were together then the s*x would be hard and wild.

 

We’d argue and scream and then fall into bed in a tumble of anger and hot passion. I get all horny just thinking about it. My friends point out that he looks just as unreliable and troublesome as all my other exes.

 

They ask me why I don’t learn from the past and why I carry on making the same mistakes. I know my adoring colleague and I would have a lovely life together, but I don’t want lovely – I want dirty.

 

I’m used to being dragged to bed by my hair and I love that. But, in my darkest moments, I worry that I’m destined for a life of disappointment. At the moment I suspect that I’ll get with my new “crazy guy” in the end.

 

I’ll lose my head, we’ll have a few months of madness and then I’ll count the cost in terms of cash and my credibility. How can I break this cycle and just be normal?