A young woman in her 20s who lives with her four male lovers has shared her experience with the world.
Tory Ojeda and her lovers
A pregnant 20-year-old lady who is in a polyamorous relationship with four men is planning to raise her baby with all her lovers.
Tory Ojeda lives with her partners in Jacksonville, Florida.
The mum-to-be began the polyamorous relationship three years ago when she met one of her partners Marc, 18, in high school and then got into a relationship with Travis, 23, two months later.
Back in July, she announced her engagement to Travis before falling in love with their long-term mutual friend Ethan, 22, and Christopher, 22, who is the baby’s father.
Speaking to Barcroft TV, she said: “Chris is the biological father. We just know that because of timing and when the approximate conception date was. Based on the approximate conception day, we had been on vacation. So it was only us. But as far as I guess, socially goes, we’re all raising the baby together, so everyone’s dad. We’re all very, very excited to be raising a baby together.”
During the interview, she also said her boyfriends are “welcome” to pursue other people if they wish to.
“Honestly, I would love it if somebody found a second partner. Dividing the time and figuring out schedules between all five people and making sure everyone feels included, it’s kind of difficult. I’d like to not be the only woman in the relationship. That would be nice.”
On how they get intimate, she said they all have their bedrooms but her partners “swap in and out” of her bed, each night, making sure each of them gets an “equal turn” in spending the night with her.
Answering questions on jealousy, Ethan said: “There are a couple of healthy ways to deal with it. Primarily just talking to each other.”
She added: “There’s always going to be like little moments of jealousy, it does take a certain amount of restraint and just getting relaxed. I will say it helps if you know the person.”
Reflecting on his own experiences in his current relationship, he said: “Seeing [Tory] with Ethan was a lot easier because I was friends with him. She and Chris were a bit dicier at first, there was a lot more jealousy and I’ll openly admit that. The same goes for Marc because I’d never interacted with them.”
On what her family and friends think about her relationship, Tory said: “Most of my friends know all my partners and they love us and think that we’re cute and such. My family is kind of quiet about their disapproval.
“Polyamory is an uncommon thing. A lot of people have grown up in monogamy culture of, you don’t love someone if you have eyes for somebody else.”
Christopher added: “My family is slowly coming around to the idea. The pregnancy has helped with that. But at the very beginning, I know my mother and father were hesitant about it.
On the reaction, she gets from people about the bizarre relationship, she said: “We get weird looks. I’ve had people just say rude comments when we’ve just been hanging out at a fast food place. I’ve been called a hoe more than once. Maybe in our future, we might see it become a common thing where people don’t bat an eye on it anymore at all. One can hope.”